Peachtree

So anyone who is not from Atlanta will probably tell you the biggest pain in the neck is trying to get somewhere downtown. One of the reasons why is because some idiot decided to name all the damn streets Peachtree! Umm, I'm no urban planner or anything, but this doesn't seem to make any sense whatsoever. It's like when they were naming the streets they named the first few, and ran out of words, then some idiot came along and said, "hey I have a great idea, let's just name them all Peachtree!" Some other idiots agreed and the result is a hot mess!!! Either that, or somebody thought it would be funny to get people lost looking for Peachtree. But, I really think it happened the first way.

They could cut down a lot of that traffic just by changing the names of some of those streets. The result-not so many lost people messing up traffic trying to find Peachtree St., Ave., ect. It's like, if you are looking up directions on how to get anywhere in Atlanta, and the address is Peachtree anything, you might as well plan to spend your day site-seeing, because you already know that getting lost is imminent.

Rep Your City

So, this is just a pet peeve of mine...If you are from or live in Southfield, Birmingham, Bloomfield Hills, Inkster, anywhere but Detroit, you should not be claiming Detroit!!! If Detroit is not in your home address, you do not live in Detroit, you live in or are from whatever city is in you address!!!

If you are from or live in Decatur, Smyrna, Marietta, College Park, even Savannah anywhere but Atlanta, you should not be claiming Atlanta! Your address does not say Atlanta! Therefore the conclusion is, you live or are from whatever city is on your address!

Now, you can say you live in wherever, which is a suburb of, or is close to that major city. But that is not the same as being the major city. So, if you want to figure out how to answer the question of where you live or where you're from...LOOK AT YOUR ADDRESS!!!

Feet and Shoes

Ok look, this is pertaining to feet and shoes. If you have crusty feet, sandals are not for you. For example, if the back of you heels are dry and cracked to the point where lotion only makes them shiny, no sandals for you, not even flip flops!!!

When your toes are hanging over the front of the shoe, IT DOES NOT FIT!!! If the back of your heels are hanging off the back of the shoes, THEY DO NOT FIT!!! If you are wearing heels, and they are causing you to develop corns, THEY DO NOT FIT!!! If your shoes are leaning to one side, because the leather has stretched out, guess what?! THEY DO NOT FIT!!! Trust me, I understand it was hard to find those shoes to match that outfit, and they were on sale, ect. But, you are doing yourself and others a great disservice, because we have to look at your nasty feet all day!

For this we will refer to the book of common sense. And in it, it says TAKE THEM OFF, THEY DO NOT FIT!!!

Guys and Jeans

SAGGING IS NOT CUTE!!! Think about the message it sends. Prisoners wear their pants this low because belts are not allowed, as they can be used to commit suicide or as weapons. The other reason they do this is to let the other men know that they are homosexual!

Now, in what way is walking around showing you *ss (or lack of in some cases) supposed to be attractive to the opposite sex?! You took the time to put on a fresh shirt, and new shoes, why not take a few minutes to pull up your pants and put on a belt to complete the look?!

But ok, if you want to walk around looking a mess, that's your choice. But just make sure, at the very least, that the jeans you decide to sag actually fit you in real life! If they "flood" (are too short) when you pull them up to where they are supposed to be, then sagging is in no way, shape, or form the answer. It just makes a bad style look worse. In which case, it's time to invest in new jeans.

And to the dudes wearing skinny jeans, especially those stonewashed with bright colors...STOP!!! Unless you are a male model (people who get paid to wear these things) or someone in entertainment (also people who get paid), do not attempt this. At the end of the day you really can't get mad when the same sex is trying you!!! That is what you put out there, and now you have confused them, and everyone else around you (including the opposite sex). Good job.

Just your size?

Today I am addressing a topic near and dear to me-clothing (yay!!!) Ok, sooo here is the thing, just because something is made in your size, does not mean it's made for you or your body type. Please try it on, and be honest about the results!

If you have cellulite, please spare us all and stay away from leggings, short shorts, and mini anything! It is not flattering, no, not even in black! We can still see it.

Skinny jeans are for skinny people. Having skinny in the name does not mean it makes you skinny. These are jeans, not miracle workers!

If you get to your 40's and still have a "nice" body, do not shop at 5.7.9, Wet Seal, or Charlotte Russe. You are grown, you should shop at age-appropriate stores! You and your grandchild should not have the same clothes.

If you have on a mini skirt that you can't bend over in, put it down! For some random reason, and it never fails, you'll have to bend over at least once when you wear it. I don't need to see all that, and you probably shouldn't show it. Hopefully your mama taught you better.

Alright, if you are wearing "booty" shorts, and the back is longer than the front. You apparently do not have the equipment required to wear the shorts (ie. booty). Please take them off, it's just sad :-( Yes, you get the sad face.

"This is the remix!"

Think about how many songs you listen to...now think about how many of the remixes sound better than the original. Does it ever cross your mind why they didn't just come out with the remix to begin with?! What ever happened to doing it right the first time?! It's almost like the artists might as well say, yeah the original song sucked, so here it is again. Only this time we did it better! Now on top of the cd single, I gotta go out and buy the remix too. Seems like a waste of money to me. This is a recession people!!!

And what is with the remixes with 50 people on it?! My attention span is not long enough to be listening to the same song all damn day! I have things to do (and if I didn't, I'm still not that interested in what all those folks have to say over one beat). At what point is a song soo long it becomes several songs? The sad thing is by the time the remix hits the radio, we've heard the original so many times that nobody cares.

Look, the best thing for artists to do is get it right the first time, not 3 or 4 versions down the road. If somebody wants to add on, make a new song! If you just have to make a remix, only 2 people allowed!

Bad Drivers Suck

So, I'm sure this has happened to you before...you are driving down the street, and you see a car waiting to pull out. As you get closer the car is still waiting, and then just when you get to the point of almost passing them- they pull out and cut you off! But then it doesn't stop there, on top of them cutting you off, they decided it's a good idea to go 2 mph!!!!

Now, like I said before we have laws, and I do not condone breaking them...however, I feel like in this situation the person cut off should be allowed to pull the offender over, drag them out of the car, and give them a swift kick!!! Why? Because, not only was it rude that you are cutting people off, but now I gotta slam on my breaks to avoid hitting your dumb *ss, and in some cases swerve to the next lane for your stupidity. It would have been different if you pulled out, and sped up to the pace of traffic, fine. But if you know your car has no pick up whatsoever, just wait that extra 2 mins.

Now the other offender is the one who does all that, and then has the nerve to make an immediate turn. Really?! You couldn't have waited to make that turn?! Is the building you going to going to disappear in the next second? You are the reason people have road rage! It is real people!!!

Censorship

So why is it that the radio continues to play songs where they have to *bleep* out every other word?! If it is really that serious, don't play the song. You know it's bad when the word in the song is ship, and it is *bleeped* out. The word is S-H-I-P!!! When did that become a "bad word?" Ok listen djs, let me let you in on a little secret...there are these things called websites, some of them are dedicated to posting song lyrics. OMG, can you believe it?! So, just a suggestion, but before you decide to *bleep* out words like ship, please just take a min to read the lyrics.

Now the radio is not the only ones responsible for this stupidity. TV is too! When did b*tch become an ok everyday word to use, when referenced to address a female? You can say that, but heaven forbid you say GOD! (lol that was an unintentional pun) That's not right. And then, it's funny how they play these movies with voice-overs, and the substitute words are used completely out of context. You know, when it gets to that point, just *bleep* it out like the radio, because you are messing up the story!

And to all the FCC type folks running around complaining about what's in the media, here's a thought, TURN IT OFF! If you don't want your kids to watch or hear it...TURN IT OFF!!! If you don't want to watch or hear it, get your fat *ss up(I could have said butt, but *ss is more effective), and TURN IT OFF!!!

Horror Movies

I really like horror movies, right, and it's not because they are scary, it's because for some reason I enjoy yelling at the people on tv. The plot is almost always the same. So here are some suggestions for the people in those situations.

Now if you are driving, and in the middle of nowhere, a random hotel may not be the best place to stop. Did anybody see Psycho?! I need you to use mapquest (it may get you lost, but at least you'll be on a main road) and plan out your trip, including any possible stops. If there are only 2 people in the town, and you have no phone service, keep going!

Next, if you are in the house alone, and you hear someone walking up stairs, get out the damn house! Go next door and call somebody. You do not need to investigate, all you need to know is you are supposed to be home alone!

If you walk into a house and a ghost comes to you and tell you to get out, follow that advice! Obviously you are not welcomed, and nobody wants to be where they are not welcomed.

Ok, if the killer is on the way to your friend's house...call them and let them know. Don't drop your cell phone and try to run to the house. The killer is going to get there before you do!

When you are running in the woods, take the heels off! Otherwise you'll trip on nothing and twist your ankle, and we all know what happens next! If, on the off chance you manage to get up, RUN! You can worry about the pain when you get someplace safe!

And finally, if you are the only minority in the group, you might as well give up! Unless you are the one the killer is after, you can count on not making it to the credits.

Fast Food Restaurants

So what is with fast food places?! How many times have you gone to a fast food joint, you place your order, get it, get home, and it's all wrong. Now, I have never worked in the fast food industry, but am I alone in feeling like it shouldn't be hard to get an order right? All you have to do is listen, press the button with the right picture, get the stuff, and put it in the bag. If I'm wrong, and there is more to it, I'm sure I'm not that far off. I won't name the place, but when I ask for mustard on my burger I always get this half squirt. Did the cost of mustard go up so much that a whole squirt is impossible?! I mean what is the cost of a whole squirt of mustard?

The other problem with these places is that the people there have bad attitudes. If you could get the orders right people might be a little nicer to you. And if you hate the job QUIT! I can understand not liking the job, but you really don't have to stay there. I don't want to pull up to your window, and I'm having a good day and you sitting there looking at me like I p*ssed in your cheerios! Whatever it was, I didn't do it, get my order right, and there won't be any problems!

Ok, and lastly I want to address the place that keeps claiming they are "waaay better than fast food." You are a fast food restaurant! You are not "waaay better!" Actually, you are confused. Why is it every time you get something good on your menu, you take it away? And I'm stuck in the drive through disappointed because my favorite menu item is no longer available. Your slogan should be, "guess what we took off the menu today?!"

Animals and People

Ok so in the light of Mike Vick's reinstatement in the NFL, I figured I'd address the animal and people bit. (See I'm not that random) First let me say, I'm all for not abusing animals. It's stupid, pointless, ect. That being said, I wonder about these animal rights activists. I get it, but I don't get it. How can you be so passionate about animals, and not so about people? You are a PERSON! People don't even know how to treat each other, so how would they know how to treat animals? How is it that the penalty for killing and abusing animals is more severe than that of killing and abusing people?! Does that make any sense? I don't think so.

On another note about animals and people...why are there so many stories about these people getting bit and ate up by wild animals? John Doe went into the mountains and a bear bit him, so now they gotta hunt down the bear and kill him. The bear was being a bear! If the bear was hungry, and John Doe was there, the bear is not gonna think, I can't eat Mr. Doe, because he's a person. The bear is gonna think, I'm hungry and there is meat. Now Mr. Doe all upset because he tried to become "one with nature," and the bear didn't get the memo. Mr. Doe, stop going places where you do not belong. You are being a volunteer statistic. Let's break that cycle of stupidity.

Baby Daddy

Ok so I'm watching Maury right, and it got me thinking about my next commonsensical. Why are there soo many people coming on his show for DNA test?! This is out of hand. Some of these mothers have been on the show 3 and 4 times, testing as many as 19 men! You have to ask, what the hell is going on in about a 2 week period that they are sleeping with all these different guys?! Raw(without protection) no less. That is not hot!!! LOL or maybe it is-and burning by now. The bright side is maybe then they will qualify for the Herpes commercials, and get to bounce around happy on the beach!(see Side Effects)

Ok and on the other side, you have to ask why these guys are putting themselves in the position to be a father when they were clearly just there for the *ss. They claim the girl was a h*e and how she slept with all these guys, including their "best friend," but they took that risk anyway. Umm, at what point do you use your brain and say "maybe this is not a good idea," or "maybe I should protect myself, just in case?" NEWSFLASH!!!! Just because the girl is a h*e doesn't mean the baby is not yours! If you slept with the girl at least admit the possibility exists. She didn't reproduce by herself. And if "you are the father," now you have to explain to your child that their mama was a h*e. Good luck with that. If you "are not the father," then congrats, but I'd recommend you head to the nearest clinic to get tested immediately!

H.A.M.S.

A H.A.M. is a Hot *ss Mess. You ever go to the club and see 4 girls walk in, the first 3 are dressed ok, clothes match and fit, hair done, ect. Then the fourth girl walks in...she has on her little sister's shirt, her stretch jeans look tired, and her shoes look like they are about to give up? She is what is referred to as a H.A.M.

Now in this particular situation she is not the only one at fault. Her friends are responsible for this mishap as well. Why? Because they let her leave the house looking like that! Clearly she needs to reevaluate her friends, because real friends don't let friends leave the house looking like a H.A.M.!

Now what do you do to prevent looking like a H.A.M.? First things first, invest in a mirror and use it! Second, if it doesn't fit-DON'T WEAR IT!!!!! Third, lotion is your friend. And finally if you have on so much makeup that you look plastic, take off a couple layers! Clowns belong in the circus, not out at the club. Just remember, eventually they are going to turn the lights on.

H.I.T.S.

Ok so let me address this, because this seems to be a MAJOR issue. First off for those who do not know a H.I.T. is a H*e In Training.

Ok so imagine this, you are sitting outside one day, and you see a little girl on the playground, cute right? Yea, it's all good until you see her climb the pole of the swings, slide down, and drop it like it's hot. Now upon seeing this, you shake your head in disgust, when out of nowhere her mom, and various other grown people who should know better, applaud her. Now in the back of your mind you are probably thinking the little girl, her mama, and all those other folks clapping need a good swift kick in the *ss. But you can't do that because we have laws! I do not condone breaking laws, even when it involves stupidity and is warranted.

Now, you're probably thinking, ok KRi where is the commonsensical? So here it is...What you are looking at is a H.I.T. Now according to the book of common sense (which as far as I know doesn't really exists, but for this we'll pretend), if the little girl is being applauded for practicing her stripper moves, she'll continue them. By the time she is old enough, she will have perfected her moves, and gone on to become, guess what, A STRIPPER! And as Dave Chappell said,"Daddy, you have failed to keep your daughter off the pole." Good job people.

Instructional Songs/Concerts

Ok so is it just me, or are song nowadays getting to be a bit much. What's with all these songs with all these instructions about what I'm supposed to be doing?! I gotta go left, right, lift my leg, bend over, lean this way, ect. Ok, first off, why am I doing on this? Because Lil' so-and-so said so? I'm sorry, but it's almost like it requires entirely too much work to listen to your music. Think about it, who really wants to be at a club doing synchronized dancing or aerobics for that matter? When did the club turn into High School Musical?

And while we are on the subject of music...if I paid money to see you perform, I shouldn't have to sing along. If I wanted to sing along, I'd still be home singing with the radio. Personally, I feel like if I'm expected to sing along, I should get a cut of the pay for that night. I did about as much singing as you did, so it's only fair (lol). Just a thought. And who is that random person running around repeating every other word? The hype man, I'm sorry but he is sooo unnecessary. I didn't come to see him, he's not effecting my hypeness. I'm not paying him. Next time, just tell your little brother NO!!!

Side Effects

Ok so my first commonsensical is all about side effects. When the side effects are worse than the problem is it worth the risk? If you watch a lot of tv like me, then you have seen those drug commercials a million times over.

I'm not going to name any specific drugs, but when the side effects for depression are all things that makes one depressed, doesn't the defeat the purpose of taking the drug?! Suicidal thoughts, sexual dysfunction, weight gain, ect, are all things that cause depression! It doesn't seem to make sense to use a drug that causes the problem you are trying to get rid of.

Ok, so moving on...this is not really a side effect concern, but more of an observation. So why is it that the people in the herpes commercials and the tampon commercials always so damn happy? Does anyone else find this disturbing? Granted one is an incurable disease, and the other is a natural female bodily function, but still. I'd imagine anyone with an STD they can't get rid of would not be happily bouncing on the beach. And speaking from personal experience a period is not all that exciting. Nothing about it makes me want to go swimming with friends or ride on anybody's damn horse (yes I said damn, because that's what it becomes at that point).

What are commonsensicals?

I'm sure when you decided to check out this blog, you were wondering what is a commonsensical. Well, it's a word that means a collection of common sense evaluations, in short, it's a word I made up (smile). So here it is a list of common sense evaluations about everyday occurrences. I am by no means an expert in these evaluations, but simply one who applies common sense to the situations. As Voltaire said, "common sense is not so common." Clearly this statement holds truth!