"Voices in My Head"

Yesterday we had some type of drill at my job.  The highlight of it all was that is was 108 degrees outside, and two trees in the blacktop parking lot (but it's not snow and so I won't complain).  We just had to stand still for a little bit and try not to sweat to death.  Eventually, we were let back in the building (yay).  So myself and my co-worker had this "great idea."  Instead of taking the elevator, we decided to walk up the steps.

Now, my inner voice is younger than my real life self.  I swear she's like a horrible "hype man," if you will.  She's about 21ish.  And she said, "yeah girl, go ahead, get a quick workout in, walk up those steps!"  Mind you, we work on the 6th floor.  OMG WHY?!  By the time I got to the 5th floor, real life me couldn't half breath.  Why?  Oh, because real life me has lungs and asthma.  So there is that.

Sooo...here it is, the next day. Uhh, real life me woke up this morning cussing inner voice me out.  Physical activities at my age ("25") is like going out for a drink, getting drunk, and then re-remembering the next day why you said you'd never drink again.  As you're praying to the porcelain god, the first thing that goes through your mind is, "WTF was I thinking?!"  Ya'll, every muscle in my body was screaming.  Inner voice did not tell real me to stretch! (She's such a B).  Her 21ish self doesn't do things like that.  She just motivates, she doesn't ask questions or remember anything from the past.  It never fails, soon as she gets going, I spend a week in recovery (limping around...throwing up...whatever)... I gotta make better choices (sigh for soreness).

"Upgrade"

The other night I called myself trying to be productive.  I opened my "fancy" laptop, went to pull up my website, and got an error message.  (Eye roll)  So my inner voice thinks, "ok, no problem,  i just have to update the program..." Click the download button...wait...wait... and get another error message.   It basically said, "B*tch, your computer is too old for this program, do not pass go, do not collect anything."  Ya'll,  I was soo irritated i shut everything down and went to bed.

The next day, I see a screen shot of the old AOL log in screen. You know the one with the little yellow man that looks like hes running, but he's really not moving, they just added lines?  OMG the horror! My grown 25ish year old self  (mind your business) would not stand for it.  If I had to wait for old AOL log in speeds, ya'll, the whole house would be shut down!  I might go turn out the street lights behind that foolishness.  All of them!  EVERYBODY is going to bed.  Just the noise of it was ingrained in my head (cringe).  Kinda like that MF Rooster.

Anyway, 48 hours later...here I am.  Back on my "fancy" computer.  Still mildly irritated.   But...it works and I can still type to ya'll,  so I guess.   It's not old AOL at least.  Old self was soo excited about that little yellow man doing nothing.  I swear, when we know better...